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Unfed Artist

Ian Castruita's Webcomic about anything that he thought was funny. Your mileage may vary.

Unfed Artist

Ian Castruita's Webcomic about anything that he thought was funny. Your mileage may vary.

Location: Cafe

  • Panel One - Ian’s at a cafe drive through. Barista - Hi! What can I get st… OH GOD! ARE YOU OK?! Panel 2 - Focus on Ian, who’s in the driver seat of his car. His face is swollen and he’s drooling and crying through squinted eyes. Ian - Who me? (wheeze) It’s OK, I just like to get an expensive coffee when I (wheeze) have a bad day. Barista - Sir, do you need an epi-pen? Panel 3: Same scene. Ian - (wheeze) How about you just load up a coffee…(wheeze) …with all the (wheeze) legal stimulants you have? Barista - You just described most of the menu.

    Allergy Season

    May 07, 2025

  • Sunday Comic Format Panel One: Ian at cafe talking to unseen companion Ian: People wonder why I look so young for being in my 40’s, and I’m pretty sure the reason is because my ancestors never lived this long before. Panel Two: Same scene. Ian looks concerned. Ian: So basically this isn’t a beauty secret as much as it is a countdown timer for a bomb that hasn’t one off yet. Panel Three: Inside Ian’s body. Characters look like cells. Lead cell: 45? What the hell is this? This operation was past retirement more than a decade ago. Panel Four: Same scene. Lead cell: Alright everyone! Listen up, you’ve done a great job but we need to make some cuts. Joints - I’m cutting your budget. And digestion… Panel Five: Same scene. Lead cell is talking to a digestion cell that kind of looks like a tube. Lead cell: …I don’t see any need for you to accept dairy anymore, do you? Panel Six: Another body cell hurries in from the left. Worker: Sir! We’ve detected cancer forming in Prostate Plaza! We need to activate the body's defenses! Panel Seven: The leader cell ponders the situation and says nothing. Panel Eight: Same scene. Lead cell: I think I want to see where this goes actually.

    Early Retirement

    Jul 31, 2024

  • Panel One: Ian at a cafe table. Ian - I thought I may have appendicitis, but it turns out... ...I just accidentally had regular milk that morning. Panel Two: Same scene. Ian - Anyway, if they didn't put oat milk in this coffee... ...we’ll know when I start farting uncontrollably. Panel Three: Zoom out to show the full cafe. In front there’s a sign that says, “Speed Dating Today!” Ian (Unseen from inside the building) - And trust me, the farting is even worse at night. I’ve had to burn my sheets the next morning more than once.

    Lightning Round

    Apr 05, 2024

  • Unfed Artist - 233 - The Gift Keeps Giving

    The Gift Keeps Giving

    Dec 09, 2022

  • 230 -Tortilla Encounter Unfed Artist and Unfed Artist Logo ® Registered Copyrights of Unfed Artist, LLC. All images copyright © 2022 Unfed Artist, LLC

    Tortilla Encounter

    Oct 28, 2022

  • Unfed Artist - Mis Pantalones Verdes

    Mis Pantalones Verdes

    Jul 15, 2022

  • Unfed Artist - Old Fashioned Charm Unfed Artist and Unfed Artist Logo ® Registered Copyrights of Unfed Artist, LLC. All images copyright © 2022 Unfed Artist, LLC

    Old Fashioned Charm

    Jul 01, 2022

  • Unfed Artist - New Sheriff In Town Unfed Artist and Unfed Artist Logo ® Registered Copyrights of Unfed Artist, LLC. All images copyright © 2022 Unfed Artist, LLC

    New Sheriff In Town

    Jun 03, 2022

  • Unfed Artist - Dangerous Plants

    Dangerous Plants

    Dec 06, 2021

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Legal Notice

Unfed Artist ® and the Unfed Artist Logo are Registered Trademarks of Unfed Artist, LLC. All images © Copyright Unfed Artist, LLC. unless otherwise indicated. All Rights Reserved.

Tags

advice album artist award burritos cafe car christmas coffee comic comic-strip cookies crowd dating doctor dog dollar guns Hair health insurance hospital humor Ian insurance internet Job laptop milk Mom music office Phone pool reindeer restaurant sandwich Santa Sean Security surgery swimming The Matrix The Mix TIWC top hat

Characters

Admiral Pop aliens art teacher Barber Bougainvillea Candidate Captain Ian Cheesy Cleaners Client climber Collin cow Cowboys Diplomats Doctor Dr. Bison Gary George Washington Harvey Hobbit Hurricane Ian Ian Inspirasaurus Jaws Learning Monster mole Mom Mr. Jumper Pokey Pop Priest Priestess Professor Mix Quinoa Cowboy Radioactive Turbo Sloth rock Santa Sean senator Susie The Mix Tourists Villagers Wagon

Locations

Amity Island apartment Art Class Austin Bagel Town Barber Shop body Bookstore Cafe Car Dealer Church Factory Florida Graveyard Grocery Store Hospital House kitchen mail room mall Medical School molehill Mountain movie theater North Pole Oak Bluffs Ocean Office outdoors park Plane Pool Restaurant School Space taxi Texas The Construct The Deckhand The Lair Tortilla Office United Nations Vale of Dunderhead Washington DC Wild West
Theme: Toocheke Premium by LeeToo.